Category Archives: Birthmother columns

Birthmother: Eight years and counting

By Birthmother – Today is May 11, 2015. My first child, Catherine, will reach 8 years of age in August.  My second child will be turning 4 this very month.  These children are both fully and undeniably planted in their … Continue reading

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Birthmother: Fork in the road

By Birthmother – “You came to the fork in the road and you took it.” A wise therapist once used this line on me.  He explained to me that sometimes it doesn’t matter whether I turn left or right.  Either … Continue reading

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Birthmother: Myth of the mind changing mother

By Birthmother – The Family Court judge who presides over adoption proceedings in the city in New York in which I live is a wise, wise woman.  She has concocted a speech, a speech which I strongly suspect she gives to … Continue reading

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Birthmother: What is a birthmother?

By Birthmother – I asked my daughter’s adoptive Daddy whether or not she’s started asking about her biological parents.  She’s 6 years old now which is certainly old enough to start wondering, to notice that something isn’t quite ‘normal’ about … Continue reading

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Birthmother: Seeing is believing

By Birthmother – What is it like to see my children grow up with their adoptive parents?  I get this question a lot. For me, getting information about my children is like getting a breath of fresh air.  When I … Continue reading

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Birthmother: Finding parents

By Birthmother – How do you choose the BEST parents for a child?  Imagine being faced with this task, browsing through profile after profile of responsible, caring people, all of whom are seeking children.  Where do you begin?  What do … Continue reading

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Birthmother: Reasons

By Birthmother – My choice to give my baby up for adoption was met with an abundance of positive feedback.  I get the impression that not everyone has this experience.  Maybe it depends on your upbringing.  I am an educated white … Continue reading

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Birthmother: Seeing me

By Birthmother – Passing on my genes One of the blessings of choosing open adoption is that I get to see and hear some of the details about my children as they grow. Each year I take a look at the … Continue reading

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Birthmother: Seeing life

By Birthmother – Pictures on the fridge: Benefits of open adoption Adoption isn’t what it used to be.  I always had the impression that adoption was a simple formula: a distressed biomom hands her baby away to a social worker, never … Continue reading

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Birthmother: Chance

By Birthmother – It’s not often that you have a clear opportunity to do something GOOD.  By GOOD I mean life-affirming, joy-inducing, compassionate, and challenging. When I got pregnant for the first time, unexpectedly, I realized that I had been given … Continue reading

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